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Popcorn UFO +7 -

Anon tries to microwave some popcorn on a warship

Categories: /x/ , /k/

I used to be in the Navy, stationed on an Aegis-class guided-missile cruiser. One day at sea, I'm taking a break on the flight deck (which was just behind the rear Aegis radar array), and I noticed all these dead birds all over the fight deck. It didn't take me too long to realize that these birds had flown in front of the radar and been microwaved to death.

This gave me an idea. I figured if it works on birds, it should work on popcorn. A microwave's a microwave, right? So, the next time we pull into port, I go to get some microwave popcon.
Unfortunately, my shopping trip coincided with Superbowl Sunday, so the microwave popcorn (and just about every other salty snack in the store) was gone. All they had left was Jiffy-Pop. I dida't even know they still MADE Jiffy-Pop. Anyway, science waits for no man (or something like that), so I return to the ship and stash the popcorn in my shop.

During our next outing, I tie some string to the handle of the Jiffy-Pop pan, and sneak out onto the weather deck. just forward of my shop was a ladder that led to the deck overlooking the radaar array (but which is closed off during radar operations for safety reasons), so I climb up there and lower the Jiffy-Pop down in front of the array.

BOOM! the Jiffy-Pop explodes immediately, showering the fight deck with burned popcorn. I pull the burst pan up, wind up my string, and chuck the entire apparatus over the side before running back into my shop.

No sooner do I walk in the door, then the phone rings. It's CICS (the "War Room"). The Officer In Charge wants me to go out on the weather deck and look behind us, and tell him if anything's there. I do, there isn't, and I tell him so. He hangs up, swearing

Later that night, I get the story from a radioman friend of mine who was in CICS at the time. Turns out that the Jiffy-Pop pan had reflected the Radar waves. For those who aren't familiar with radar operation, a radar array sweeps back and forth, radiating waves the whole time. The waves are then, reflected back to the array by anything they hit (such as planes, another ship, etc).
This reflection tell the radar how big something is, how far away it is, etc. The problem comes with the wavelengths involved. At too close a distance, and object can show up on the radar as being at a different distance than it really is. Or a different size

My Jiffy-Pop pan appeared on the radar as a three-mile-wide contact, 100 yards off the stern, and was only on-screen for a couple of seconds before disappearing! The OIC was freaking out about it, and had called the Air Force.

So, in the end, my curiosity about the microwave properties of an Aegis radar caused a US Navy warship to file a false UFO report!
I didn't tell anyone I was involved until long after I got out!


I wonder how many military UFO encounters have been caused by things like this?

epic thread

That's a cool story, dude.

Awesome. The weather radar in the nose of C-130's is not quite as spectacular, but itis still useful. When on the ground with the a/c powered up, you can walk out to the
nose, open the radome, and sit a cup of cold coffee inside the radome. Then shut the radome, go up the cockpit, and flip the radar on for a few seconds. Voila, hot coffee.

That's hilarious