>Be 25 >Living alone in a kinda shitty house in a bad neighborhood because can't afford anything better and won't live with roomates >Wake up close to 4AM >Hear a woman screaming outside >Look out window, see nothing >Screaming quiets, hear the faint sound of wood scraping across pavement >Think maybe some girl is getting raped out there >Grab a golf club I keep in my room for protection and a flashlight >Go outside >"Anybody out here? >Walk around back yard, see nothing >Still hear faint noise of wood scraping >Walk back to front yard >See something in the shadows near my neighbor's patio >Shine my light on it >WIF?!? >it's a nude black woman's torso with freakishly long ams facing away from me. Long dirty hair, about 4 feet tall >Look down >Her lower body is some kind of flat bottomed wooden thing, like she has a boat for legs >She tums her head toward me >Here eyes are emply sockets, she has no nose >RUN THE FUCK BACK INSIDE >Hear her scream at me, ear rapingly shrill >Call the cops, tell them there's a crazy woman outside my neighbor's house, leave out the part about her having a boat-thing for legs >Dispatcher man tells me cops will be there to investigate, they never show up because bad part of town and they have better things to do. >Stay up all night with golf club in hand wishing I owned a gun >Hear wooden scraping for about an hour later, stops close to dawn >Ask neighbor about it next day, he gets really anxious and sweaty, denies knowing what I'm talking about There was no fucking way he didn't see it. I think maybe he saw it too but was so freaked out he doesn't want to believe it.